The underlying assumption of spiritual direction is that God is constantly speaking to us; we just have to learn how to listen. He speaks to us through the warp and woof of everyday life. We may hear His voice in a song, a painting, some words of a friend, while reading scripture, the liturgy, basically anywhere.
Spiritual direction is essentially a trained individual helping another to hear God speak to them. A spiritual director is a catalyst or a sounding board for the directee. It is not therapy where the emphasis is on diagnosing the causes of a person’s afflictions. It is not mentoring or discipleship where the emphasis is on teaching someone. Nor is it just two friends sharing their spiritual experiences. It is a focused prayerful listening time where the director hopes to help the directee delve deeper into his or her experiences and hear that Voice. I always emphasize “trained” because without training a director can easily let it slide into therapy, mentoring, simple spiritual conversation, or advice giving.
Typically directors meet with someone for about an hour every 4-6 weeks. The person brings to the session some experience that he or she would like to share and explore more deeply. It is the job of the director to prayerfully listen and ask open-ended questions to help the person process the experience more fully. Here is a sample session that I made up. In interest of space it is kept very concise.
Directee (T1): Last week I went to the art gallery and was captivated by this one painting.
Director (D1): What was it about the painting that captivated you?
T2: It was this scene of a beach with wind blowing through the trees; a person was walking along the beach. It made me feel calm, but I am not sure why.
D2: Calm?
T3: Yes. Just staring at it made me feel at peace and relaxed. I have been puzzling over why this captivated me so for the last week.
D3: Can you connect this painting to any other experience that may have had that gave you feelings of peace and calm?
T4: (thinks a moment) You know, I never thought about this, but I guess it sort of reminds me of this time that I was on such a beach, some years ago. I was going through a very difficult time in my life.
D4: How does that experience connect with peacefulness and calm?
T5: Well, on that beach that day, I was just soaking in the sun, feeling the breeze through my hair, thinking about all of my worries. Then suddenly I felt God’s presence. I felt Him say to me that He provides the sunshine and the breeze and that He would provide me the strength to get through this difficult time in my life. As soon as I “heard” this I was flooded with peace, knowing that things would be OK. It was tough for a while after that but I just seemed to have the strength to see it through.
D5: So this painting reminded you of this experience and brought back the same feelings?
T6: Yes. And you know, things have been hectic for me lately again. I have been feeling kind of abandoned by God. Maybe this was His way of reminding me that He will always be there for me.
D6: Would you be willing to spend some time in prayer right now and let us revisit this beach and see how it might speak to your current circumstances?
T7: Sure….
In this brief snippet, I have tried to illustrate how a session would normally go. Notice that the director is asking very open-ended and reflective questions. This helps the director avoid moving the conversation to his or her own agenda or perceived outcome. It also helps the person explore their memories, feelings, and insights and allows God to piece things together with the person. It may seem surprising that this person did not connect the two experiences before this session but it is not uncommon for people to not piece things together like this until they have an opportunity to talk about it and reflect on it in a concentrated way. I have frequently done this myself!
I have found having my own director to be very useful over the years. I have also found that being a director has been an incredible blessing to me as I have had the privilege of sharing in many people’s journeys. Quite often God has spoken to me through a directee, bringing insight into my own life circumstances.
If you are serious about your faith journey, I would highly recommend that you seek out a trained director. I think that you will find the benefits amazing. There are a number of spiritual directors around Michigan and the country. I can refer you to some here in the State. You can also contact local retreat houses, religious orders, etc… Many of these have or know of qualified directors. One national directory can be found at Spiritual Directors International (www.sdiworld.org).
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